imafuturist | Apartment Above Stark Industries, Saturday Morning

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Apartment Above Stark Industries, Saturday Morning

Rhodey didn't arrive yesterday with everyone else, instead he showed up bright and early Saturday morning. With the promise of a home cooked breakfast that wasn't charred.

For that reason Tony was willing to forgive him.

That and because he was Rhodey and deserved only nice things in life.

"C'mon, we talked about this," Tony said, leaning against the counter top to watch Rhodey make eggs like that shit was magic.

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"There is a woman knocking on your window," T'Challa pointed out, enjoying his eggs. Because it would be rude to undermine his host and open it, after all.

"What?" Give Tony a minute to catch up with that. "There's a door, Jessica," he muttered, opening the window anyway.

"This is faster," Jessica said, taking her mask off as she climbed in. "Anyone else around here have cartoon pigs following them around?"

There was a long silence in the kitchen in response to that. "Tones, only you."

"No, I'm as lost as you are," Tony insisted. "A cartoon pig?"

"Calls himself Spider-Ham, and I wish I was joking," Jessica said. "By the way, hi everyone, I'm Jessica. And I'm not crazy, I swear."

"I would never call you insane," Tony promised. "This is T'Challa--" Who nodded politely. "And Rhodey." Who gave her a wave of a spatula as he continued to be the only one who knew how to cook.

"Jan is probably still sleeping."

"Nice to meet everyone," Jessica said. "Apparently the pig comes from an alternate reality where he's Spider-Man. More or less. He's my guest this weekend."

"It is safe to say he is not from our reality," T'Challa said with a note of amusement.

Rhodey really hoped that was the case. Because his life was already weird enough, thank you. "Did you want breakfast, Jessica?"

"Am I ever going to be fed?" Tony whined.

The answer was no. Not until he started listening to Rhodey.

"Sure. Thanks, Rhodey," Jessica said before taking a seat. "But... no bacon or anything. For obvious reasons."

Rhodey paused and then made an incredibly disturbed face at the thought. "Duly noted," he said. "There's coffee too because that you can always guarantee is around."

"You can share my guests," Tony suggested, abandoning his quest for food to get her a coffee cup. "I have too many."

He said with love.

"I have enough on my hands with the pig," Jessica said. "But I can distract them through the end of breakfast.

She turned to T'Challa and said, "Hey guys, be distracted, okay?"

"I am distracted," he assured her solemnly.

"Ha ha. Do you want cream or sugar?" Like a heathen, Jessica.

"Nope. Give it to me straight," Jessica requested.

"Damn right," Tony muttered, passing her a cup. "Jessica has been helping me with the Osborn thing."

See, he wasn't being unreasonable about help here.

Rhodey rolled his eyes, shoving a plate of scrambled eggs and toast at her. "Oh, so you're not trying to tell her to stay out of it?"

"I'm terrible at listening," Jessica said. "Also, I'm from a different world and have a lot of experience with Osborns. He can't touch me the way he can any of you."

"What sort of experience?" T'Challa asked, calmly ignoring how Stark and Rhodes were trying to have an entire conversation with facial expressions.

"We had an Osborn where I'm from. There are differences - mine turned into a giant goblin monster, kind of like the Hulk but smaller and with fire powers - but the same kind of genius mixed with crazy, crazy insanity," Jessica said. "We butted heads a few times."

Well, he and Peter did. But that was extra detail.